Life is hard, everyone knows that. But when you remain emotionally detached from everything it seems to just fly past... With my life at a cross roads I don't know how to continue. What should I do? Where should I go to do it? What's the best choice? What do I want?
You think you know someone (lets call this person Dad?) and then Dad lets you down, becomes a petulant little child and you can't do anything about it because people say "he's still your Dad". Fatherhood is like Trust, and like Trust it must be earned, and once you have earned that Trust you have to maintain that Trust. But not everyone is capable of maintaining Trust. And those are the people that will miss out on my life. I don't mean to sound big headed -- that person would miss out on my life -- because I know that I am not an extraordinary person. However. Dad contributed to the start of my life and he won't be able to share it due to the lack of Trust.
Up rooted and moved to suffolk... I don't mind suffolk really it's a nice place to live, albeit sparsely coated with things to do. the only thing I dislike about suffolk is:
1) the lack of hills - I mean really guy! This place is so flat that it's like God has smashed with his giant non-stick frying pan.
2) the lack of my best friend - she knows who she is! thing have changed in the past six years, but she remains a constant pillar in my life. Dude i love you and would defend you from the world should it turn it's ugly head on you!
Now back to the emotionally detached... it's easier to cut loose and be objective when your emotions are put in the back corner. i'm not saying that I'm stone cold, but when it comes to war, in the heat of the battle, emotions are your worst enemy. Life is a war, a fight to limit the pain, the hurt and the sorrow.
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